To tattoo or not to tattoo, that is the question

If I told my grandparents that I planned to get a tattoo, I would likely give them a heart attack in their old age. They come from a time where getting a tattoo meant permanently marking your body and was mainly reserved for those who had served in the military. However, with the rise in safe, effective laser tattoo removal, tattoos are not necessarily permanent any longer, which is both good and bad.

The ability to remove a tattoo is blessing for those who got a ill-advised tattoo when inebriated, or an ex-lover’s name tattooed pre-breakup, or a barbed wire tattooed on their bicep in a time when that was still cool. On the other hand, now that laser tattoo removal is readily available, tattoos are essentially only semi-permanent. For instance, though a lower back tattoo (also unjustly called a tramp stamp) may be cute for a 20-year-old woman in college, the cuteness factor may decrease by the time she is a mother of three. Affordable and safe laser tattoo removal means that you can now have a tattoo for a single period in your life or undo a bad decision.

My mother always told me that I had better really care about something to get it tattooed. Throughout relationships and friendships, joining a sorority, overcoming many challenges, and learning numerous life lessons, I have yet to care about something that much. Perhaps as I get older and see more of the world, I will begin to care about something enough to want to get a tattoo in commemoration. Then again, if regret set in, I could always get it removed.

Here is a link to a laser tattoo guide that gives more information on the process: Tattoo Removal Guide

Hiatus

Oh the evolution of my blog.... I started it to share my travels with Honey and other family members, then it took a two-year hiatus while I was in graduate school (as did everything else non-academic in my life), and now it's back and it shall focus on my cooking adventures.

I like cooking. I love cooking! However, often times my idea of cooking involves several of the ingredients having started in a box or can. I don't have time to make my own refried beans or any kind of beans for that matter, I like bread that is so light that it can be formed into bread balls, and I'm obsessed with Honey Nut Cheerios (which I swear are more sugar now than any other ingredient).

I have not made the transition as many of the trendy health-inistas (if there can be fashionistas, why not health-inistas?) to whole wheat everything. Frankly, it's nasty. It's a funny texture and tastes earthy. By earthy I mean it tastes like the earth.... like dirt. This is an internal struggle I have between being healthy and actually enjoying what I put into my mouth.

The first goal is to cook more. Not assemble boxed ingredients, but actually cook from scratch. The second goal is to develop a balanced diet. If I made a food pyramid of my diet, it would be a square with four equal sections- candy, fruits/veggies, protein, grains. My lack of grains (particularly the good kind) is a serious concern. It leaves me with less energy and I'm hungry again an hour after I eat. Lastly, I've fallen into a rut of food monotony. I know how to cook several dishes/variations of those dishes well. I just cook the same things over and over. However, at the store, I often see different ingredients that I want to incorporate but I'm not familiar with how to use them. Then I ran across this blog "100 Days of Real Food" (http://www.100daysofrealfood.com/real-food-defined-a-k-a-the-rules/) and my first thought was- challenge accepted! I'm going to try 10 days of real food to start. We'll see how that goes. I've already started by purchasing some of the staple ingredients and made two of the recipes.

Granola with dried blueberries

"Times they are a changing"

Whoa things have been cray-cray the last month! It was a few weeks ago that my PI (my mentor, my boss, my paycheck) called a lab meeting. Usually these things are planned far in advanced and the discussion topid is known. This was a very cloaks and daggers meeting. I had a bad feeling. At the meeting he informed us that he had resigned that morning. . . . Seriously the ". . . ." was actually what was running through my mind. You know that buzzing feeling in your ears after hearing something really loud, that's what was running through my mind. I was shocked. I had just met with my PI that morning to discuss the future direction of my project and had no indication there was no future...

In undergrad I knew I wanted to "help people" and have always had an interest in healthcare. Thus, I chose to study biology thinking this would allow me to accomplish my mission (without really knowing what kind of career would best allow me to do that). This was not a well though out plan, and I was quite naive. Fast forward six years, I found myself spending long hours, isolated, centrifuging solutions. Though biomedical research is extremely important, I found myself missing interaction with the members of the community. I knew I wanted to more directly affect change, but at the same time really use the scientific/quantitative/hypothesis testing side of my brain. I then explored careers in public health. I feel like I got on a single track, trying to groom myself for this crazy competitive career that I actually didn't want to do. At the time I was frustrated at why I hadn't heard the discipline "public health" until my senior year of college. It is the more practical application of disease prevention. I had tried to make my experience at Hopkins be a means to an end. In addition to my PhD, I applied to the MS Public Health program in the Department of International Health (Global Disease and Epidemiological Control) at Hopkins Bloomberg School of Public Health (#1 ranked). I liked the global perspective, heavy biostatistic focus, and epidemiological focus. Epidemiology is studying disease from the population perspective. It's essentially the opposite of biomedical research, where you study an extremely specific molecule which is part of a pathway in a disease.

I was accepted to the program! I pulled strings to get both my PI and my graduate program to agree. I had worked it out so I didn't have to pay the nearly $50,000/year tuition either! Double yeah! But it was not meant to be. With the departure of my PI, so went that opportunity. I would need to find a new lab and a new thesis project to remain in my graduate program. The projects are not transferrable. Due to government budget cuts in the last year, only a small proportion of the faculty in my department was taking a graduate student. I didn't want to have my PhD extended another year and be pigeonholed into joining a lab that I wasn't really interested in their research. I could also take out >$80,000 in student loans to pay for my MSPH from Bloomberg. I weighed my options and decided to receive a Master's Degree from Hopkins and enter the working world.

I am moving to Denver in two weeks and I am looking for public health focused work. If you know me, you know I like to plan things out years in advance. Therefore, having only a few weeks to throw together a Master's Thesis, coordinate a cross country move, look for a job in this economy, find housing, and sell/give away pretty much everything I own has made me completely lose my mind. I hope I'm doing the best thing for me. I think it's one of those situations where three months from now I'll be happier than I've ever been, but right now it doesn't seem that way. :-(

Green thumb!

Now that I'm not getting home from work at 7pm, after the sun has gone down, and completely exhausted. I'm working on developing hobbies, trying new recipes, making friends, and just generally trying to better myself. One issue that has really been important to me is taking as little from the environment as possible and trying to give as much back as is feasible. I'm getting ready to start vermicomposting. I'm going to take the easy way out and purchase a Worm Factory (http://www.naturesfootprint.com/worm-factory-360) for about $115 which has been scientifically designed to enhance composting. There are also DIY methods that include a big plastic storage bin, worms, and newspaper.

I'm also trying to reduce the amount of meat I consume. This is not necessarily on account of the Earth's well-being but more for my own. One day I just didn't want to deal with cooking it anymore. This is great because it has forced me to delve into a whole new cooking realm. This isn't to say I don't still enjoy a good burger, it's just that I don't cook it at home.

I went to a seminar last week regarding food preservation taught by the owner and chef at a local restaurant called Woodberry Kitchen (http://www.woodberrykitchen.com/). It was really informative and we got samples too! The aim of the restaurant is to get everything local.

Woodberry Kitchen relies on longstanding relationships with the growers of the Chesapeake to provide the ingredients that nourish and delight our guests. At our table, you join us in supporting sustainable agriculture that respects the abundance and traditions of the region while helping to ensure its future.

The menu is ever changing with the availability of local ingredients. Because of this, they've had to learn to can and preserve foods from growing season so they can still make amazing dishes throughout the winter. As many butchers like to take the "head to tail" approach with animals, they do it with all kinds of foods. I think more people (myself included) need to take a page out of their book. Even if you may desire something else, you should work with what you have, and maybe you can create something great out of it! One of the coolest things I thought they did was that they are unable to get local olives to put in their drinks so they use tiny, unripened, green, pickled tomatoes which they are able to get locally and pickle themselves as garnish. They look so similar to olives and they tasted almost exactly the same! A little creativity can go a long way. The dining prices are probably a little more steep than most graduate students can afford but maybe sometime I'll make it there. In the mean time, I can use some of the things I learned to bring a little bit of Woodberry Kitchen to my kitchen.

The chef from Woodberry Kitchen has several growers/vendors he picks up from, but I posed the question of the practicality of doing this for an individual. It's not really practical for me to drive to an orchard and hour away just to get a pound of apricots and then drive somewhere else to get come cucumbers. The chef directed me to Hopkins CSA. After researching this idea, I think it will help me to eat more seasonally and locally. "CSA" stands for Community Supported Agriculture. You pay one lump sum and get 24 weekly deliveries of fresh local produce (from One Straw Farm) delivered right to Hopkins Medical Campus and you need only stop by and pick it up. For under $25 a week, you'll get a basket of whatever fruits and veggies are in season. A typical week's booty might include: 1 bunch of leaf lettuce 1 quart basket of tomatoes 1 large eggplant 3 cucumbers 3 peppers 2 bunches of kale 1 quart basket of potatoes 1 whole watermelon

I think for how much food you are getting, that price is comparable to the price at the store. I have always hesitated because I simply can't eat that much before it would go bad. However, you can also "share" a share. So for ~$12/wk I could have half of that. Another cool thing that they do is that there are always leftovers that people don't pick up. You can read about what happens to the food here, http://www.livablefutureblog.com/2010/09/food-dignity, but essentially for every 10 shares purchased, the farms donate one share to local organizations that provide emergency food assistance. Helping myself and helping others at the same time-- in the words of one of my sorority sisters, "loves it!"

I'm also trying my hand at gardening.The only problem is that I'm attempting to do it on our deck (about 7'x 14' of space). For someone who doesn't have a green thumb in the first place, trying to grow a few kinds of plants in pots is difficult.

Grow already! This was a few weeks ago so I'll update with my new setup soon. I still haven't figured out why I get incredible joy out of watching my plants grow. Oh... the simple pleasures in life.

Stuff I'm cooking

Weight Watcher's Chicken Pot Pie





Cream cheese and blueberry stuffed french toast with blueberry reduction.

Another Day in Baltimore

Heath Ledger as The Joker: Introduce a little anarchy. Upset the established order, and everything becomes chaos. I'm an agent of chaos.

I feel like every day I'm thinking, can my day get any worse? I should stop asking myself because it seems like it always does. I'm part of a volunteer program called IMP, Incentive Mentoring Program and you have a "family" which consists of several Hopkins students all focusing on one student. Participating in the program thus far has been fairly rewarding.

However, oday at Dunbar High School, all the tutors were standing in the lobby, each of us waiting to catch "our" kid for tutoring when we see the students "surge" towards the stairwell. I can't think of any other way to describe it. We've all seen Finding Nemo, so imagine a crowd of people moving like minnows or a school of fish. A few seconds later, fighting through the crowd, we see one of the coaches dragging a girl by her hair (well what was left of it). He tossed her in the office. The minnows surged towards the office, which conveniently has glass walls, perfect for viewing the drama within.

The staff told all the students to get outside. You can hear the noise level quadruple with people talking about who hit who first and who won etc. I'm standing there, the only person standing still, terrified. In the back of my head I thought I should help herd kids outside, but I was frozen and sensed it was going to get worse. As the students are trickling outside, they suddenly begin moving quicker- racing outside. I see students climb up on the railings, shouting, hollering, and rooting for something that I can't see. The two school cops (and I say cops because they are fully armed) race outside and one (who must be pushing 250 lbs) grabs the two main fighting girls by a handful of hair and holds them apart, taking them to the office, while they keep taking swings at each other. I see ones red bra exposed, I see bits of real or synthetic hair floating through the air, the other wriggles out of her hoodie. It seems he can't hold them far enough apart. The hoodie-less girl falls and the other girl is able to get a few more punches in then stomps on her face. The minnows surge inside behind the relentless fighting girls. The whole school lobby filled up again in two seconds.

Since both girls go down still trying to fight each other, the officer falls off balance and he goes down to his knees. Students from the crowd start kicking him. Seriously eight kids start beating on the officer. I couldn't believe my eyes. Every available adult (minus me who had retreated to the corner of the room) jumps in and starts tossing kids off. The choir teacher is elbow deep in high schoolers. Kids start fighting other kids. Kids start fighting adults. A riot broke out where everyone was just swinging at everyone.

The office locked the outside doors (as the office staff remained safely behind the glass), the students outside who are left out of all this fun start banging on the glass. Thank goodness it's bulletproof or it probably would have shattered. The officer gets the two girls into the office, which locks again as the minnows (which are now like piranhas) try to surge inside. I asked one girl what happened, she shrugged and said some girls were fighting over what one of them had said to the other. I am traumatized and she didn't seem phased. I was thinking wow, another day in the life.....

Long story short (or less long), they shut down the school, everyone had to leave, no tutoring. Which is fine, I never did actually see the kid I tutor anyway.

We (luckily) live in a country where there is order,the government maintains control, and for the most part people follow the law. There were a few occasions like September 11th, or the South Central Riots, a where control was lost. I never realize how much comfort I take in assuming that the CIA is keeping me safe from terrorists, and the Baltimore Police are keeping me safe from drunk drivers and getting jumped in the parking lot, and that I can go to the coffee shop without thinking I might get blown up today by a suicide bomber.

When there is a little loss of control, it seems like things get crazy really quickly. The Joker in Batman has, to me, been one of the most terrifying characters I have ever seen. Scenes like on the two boats when the people were trying to decide whether to blow up the prisoners to save themselves and vice versa. I asked myself what I would do in that situation... and the answer scared me. You never know who you'll become in a time of crisis. You aren't safe from others and you aren't safe from yourself. When perfectly normal people (like the students) get a mob mentality, they might do things they normally never would have dreamed of doing. Today I got a little taste of how others experience Baltimore all the time. The Joker says it best.

I just did what I do best. I took your little plan and I turned it on itself. Look what I did to this city with a few drums of gas and a couple of bullets. Hmmm? You know... You know what I've noticed? Nobody panics when things go "according to plan." Even if the plan is horrifying! If, tomorrow, I tell the press that, like, a gang banger will get shot, or a truckload of soldiers will be blown up, nobody panics, because it's all "part of the plan". But when I say that one little old mayor will die, well then everyone loses their minds!

I had planned to just tutor my kid, and that entire plan fell apart within minutes. And I was scared.

I need to work on my plating so my food looks like this.

Here are some plating tips! http://www.learnfoodphotography.com/food-plating-and-food-styling-for-your-camera/
Hmm... I tried the sauce thing. It didn't work out.

Rosemary-balsamic turkey cutlets with quinoa.

My cooking adventure!

The more stressed out I get, the more I'm trying to make sure I make time for things that relax me. Right now it's yoga and cooking that are keeping me sane. I wanted to blog a little about cooking (a la Kelsey) so here it goes.

I made flank steak and balsamic green beans with parmesan potatoes. The recipe is courtesy of my Cooking Light Magazine and it says it will be ready in 40 minutes. It took me about 40 minutes. http://www.myrecipes.com/recipe/beef-tenderloin-steaks-balsamic-50400000118569/

2 teaspoons butter, divided
1 cup vertically sliced yellow onion
1 cup vertically sliced red onion
1/4 cup sliced shallots
3 garlic cloves, minced
1/2 cup fat-free, lower-sodium beef broth
2 cups green beans, trimmed
2 tablespoons balsamic vinegar
1/4 teaspoon salt, divided
4 (4-ounce) beef tenderloin steaks or 1 pound flank steak
1/4 teaspoon freshly ground black pepper
Cooking spray
2 cups of mashed potatoes
1/2 cup fresh parmesan cheese

The green beans: these were amazing! I warmed them up and ate them all week. *sidenote: after watching the Food Network: the Big Waste, I've been trying to use produce that might be slightly less than perfect. Half of my green beans were older, so they had a few brown marks, but I used them anyway!
1. Melt 1 teaspoon butter in a medium saucepan over medium-high heat. Add onions and shallots; sauté 6 minutes. Add garlic; sauté 1 minute. Add broth; cook 4 minutes or until onions are tender and liquid almost evaporates. Add beans and vinegar; cover and cook 4 minutes or until beans are crisp-tender. Remove from heat. Stir in remaining 1 teaspoon butter and 1/8 teaspoon salt; keep warm.

The steak: The recipe uses beef tenderloin, it suggest that if you are on a budget you can substitute flank steak, so I did. The jury is still out as to whether this was a good idea. The flank steak was a little tough.
Sprinkle steaks with remaining 1/8 teaspoon salt and pepper. Heat a cast-iron skillet over medium-high heat. Coat pan with cooking spray. Add steaks to pan; cook 3 minutes on each side or until desired degree of doneness. Let stand 5 minutes. Serve with bean mixture.

The potatoes: To 2 cups mashed potatoes, stir in 1/2 cup grated fresh Parmesan cheese. Add 1/8tsp of freshly ground black pepper. If you want, you can also toss 1/4 cup thinly sliced green onions.

It was delicious the first night, and the following 3 or 4 nights I ate it!!

Completely Inspirational

I've been called "cold" more times than I can count. Samantha Garvey's incredible story made my eyes get a little moist. She is completely inspirational. Take 7 minutes and watch this!

Samantha Garvey's Incredible Story - The Ellen DeGeneres Show

Watching her dad tear up at the end almost make me break out in a full on sob.

In another life... I was a photographer

But seriously. I think I would be so happy in that profession.
Ok I'm not quite there yet. I need to not to just take pictures of pretty things that turn out well but take amazing pictures of normal things.

Sabrina's birthday

For Sabrina's birthday, we went to Oregon for a couple of days. We visited the ocean and the aquarium! We also fit in some shopping and spa-ing. It was a relaxing girls getaway for sure! It was so fun to be with Sabrina and her mom as they experienced new travel related things like riding public transportation! (Even though we were FREEZING!)


I <3 Portland! The scenery and people were amazing!
I was quite sold on the city. And as I become more environmentally conscious, I was impressed at how "green" the city is. There were solar trash compacters at the park, the liquid/solid flushing on the toilettes was standard, everyone was using reusable bags. It was good to see.

We also went to Body Worlds. No photos allowed but it was SO weird in an eerie sort of way. That kind of thing makes me, as well as a lot of people, question their own mortality. As a biomedical scientist, it was really cool to see whole bodies, and then see the layers peeled off one by one. Note to self: learn more about Gunther von Hagens' plastination technique http://www.bodyworlds.com/en/prelude.html

Whenever there is something new and caring, of course there is controversy. Don't get me started on bioethics. I think in the field of medicine/science it really is a slippery slope.

In October 2003, a parliamentary committee in Kyrgyzstan investigated accusations that von Hagens had illegally received and plastinated several hundred corpses from prisons, psychiatric institutions and hospitals in Kyrgyzstan, some without prior notification of the families.

He said he had received nine corpses from Kyrgyzstan hospitals, none had been used for the Body Worlds exhibition, and that he was not involved with nor responsible for the notification of families.

Me thinks something sounds fishy here....
Animal rights organizations (though I don't usually give these much creedence, but still) have claimed he didn't have proper papers for animals that he has acquired.

A few years ago I remembered seeing a special about an investigation regarding bodies of Chinese prisoners possibly having been acquired without consent.

In January 2004, the German news magazine Der Spiegel reported that von Hagens had acquired some corpses from executed prisoners in China; he countered that he did not know the origin of the bodies and went on to cremate several of the disputed cadavers.

Von Hagen was able to get an injunction to stop the magazine from printing it. Still... something is off. I'm fine with gaining knowledge from a display where all people were willing participants but if they didn't consent, didn't have the capacity to consent, or didn't know exactly what they were consenting to, I do not want to support that (it costs $25 to see the display). It didn't take a psychic to foresee that as soon as this got popular, issues with how the bodies were procured would arise. Considering this is an international exhibit, things get confusing because different countries have their own rules with regards to protecting the dead. I think it's really dangerous to start down this path. With every good thing, people getting to see an learn about the human body and its systems in a totally unique and cool way, there comes a costly negative- ethical issues arise. Think stem cell research. Food for thought.

-B

I believe I am taking on a new endeavor. Updates soon.

It seems like I overbook and overextend myself. I know that seems counter-intuitive given the previous statement.


I purchased these new reusable goody bags. I find myself more and more seeing things as I waste them, so I'm trying to be a little more careful. I bring my lunch and sometimes dinner and most certainly snacks every day so I go through a lot of plastic bags. I try to use Tupperware when I can, but sometimes my lunch bag just doesn't fit ten little Tupperware containers! I will update how effective the bags are.

It's sad now that my life consists of work and buying stuff on Amazon.

I subscribe to a lot of magazines and I'm always tearing out articles, recipes, or photos of outfits I want to emulate. These items have stacked up on my desk, and I'm starting to feel like a hoarder. I have stacks of articles that I want to save for future use but no organization to them so it's rare that I'll actually go back and refer to them. So I decided to get a big binder and fill it with sheet protectors and organize my clippings. Next time I want to make a new recipe, I can just flip to that section and see if there is anything that sparks some creativity!

Happy New Years!

One of my new years resolutions: To blog more! I have found a lot of websites that I find helpful, so I'll be sharing a lot more links in case anyone is interested in the same things as me... also so my sources of information will be clear. Usually I try to be fairly neutral on subjects I post on here(in contrast to my personality where I am very opinionated) because I didn't want those thoughts to be made public, but I've started thinking, "hey this is my blog, if you don't like it, STOP READING IT!"

I have finally hit my stride here in Baltimore, and having that under control allows me to focus on one of my passions, women's rights. I have been doing a lot more reading and even catching up on politics (if you know me, you know deliberately ignore politics)where women's rights legislation is involved.

As I continually work on myself, the new year is just another opportunity to set new lifestyle goals more commonly known as new year's resolutions (NYRs). I read on jezebel.com that one reader's NYR was to give out one new Kiva loan a month. It got me thinking.... http://www.kiva.org/about/how

I had heard about this program a few years ago. As one who made such little income at that time that I wasn't even required to pay taxes, it wasn't really feasible for me. Now it is! I think for money that I would be willing to donate to a cause anyway, lending it out through this organization in order to build small businesses and therefore build infrastructure may be more helpful (to the recipients) in the long run. I will try to focus on lending to women because I think it is important for them to get their small businesses off the ground and gain some independence. See, now I've written it down here for all of the blogosphere to read so I must do it!


The one guideline I set for determining my NYRs (or goals as I like to call them) is that they are bigger than me. It's easy to get caught up in "I'm going to drop 20 pounds by... like... tomorrow" or "I will get organized" or vices you will give up, drinking, smoking, etc, all things that start with me me me. I'm trying to focus on things that will help others, the environment, or are for the greater good. I think that focusing on things like that make the "resolutions" stick.

I have some general ideas but I don't know whether it's beneficial or harmful to get too specific. For instance in my mind saying a goal is "reducing my carbon footprint" without anything more specific means I will constantly work on this in different ways. On the other hand, it could be followed by specific goals I want to meet/maintain like "eat less meat: one day a week I will be vegetarian" or "walk somewhere each week instead of drive" or "begin composting by Feb 1", but I feel like these are definite accomplished or failed and therefore harder to maintain for a year, let alone as a lifestyle. However, if "reducing my carbon footprint" is the goal, then if you have a week where you slack off on doing things to support that goal, you can say "welp, this is motivation to do better next week!" I think I will focus on big goals and switch off how I choose to accomplish these goals.

1. Give 4 Kiva loans. (Ok I really had to be specific with this one or I wouldn't do it)

2. Reduce my carbon footprint through REDUCTION, reuse, and recycling, trying to buy local, consuming less meat, carpool to work?, walk more, attempt to compost food, using less energy.

3. Treat my body better by exercising regularly which is a given but I need to include more strength training because I'm getting old!, make time to practice yoga, slow down when I'm tired I believe it's called "listening to your body", make enough time for sleep, limit alcohol consumption, minimize stress, and make healthy food choices. This will come in handy in the long run because I will be solidifying a lifestyle that I can teach to my kids and it also is the best bet for living longer and happier.

4. Really commit to a volunteer project where I am a good fit. I have tried a few while in Baltimore, and I hadn't really found one that I could see myself doing for years and becoming more and more involved in. Right now I'm thinking House of Ruth http://www.hruth.org/. It's a shelter for abused women and their children in Baltimore, but after researching it, it is so much more than just a shelter.

In talking about change in myself, I wonder how I can inspire change in others. http://thefuntheory.com/ This might be a start!

I want to travel again! I want my life to be an adventure again.

What a difference a year makes!

It's officially been a year since I got to Baltimore. Oh what a difference a year makes! The best illustration would probably be from the point of view of my mom. Aug 2010, I dropper her off at the airport with my room not fully set up, I didn't know where anything was located in the city, we had seen a crack deal go down in front of my house which we had found (upon our arrival in Baltimore) was in an alleyway in a dicey area, and I was basically alone and unhappy. This time when she left, my room at my new amazing apartment was fully set up (because I already had most of the furniture etc) and I know some people now, some friends had even offered to help me move, I was able to show her some of my favorite spots because I am more familiar with the city, and my new apartment is in the suburbs so there is ample parking, a pool, a gym, GREEN trees, and it's very safe. We spent a lot of time moving and then just being lazy, watching trash tv and relaxing. Although, we did make it to the zoo, hence the picture above.


I also went to NY this past week to visit a friend. I fell in love with the city. There is so much to see, even people watching provides endless entertainment! I had some amazing gelato at this place called Il Laboratorio Del Gelato. I also successfully rode the subway and I also saw Central Park which I fell in love with. I think I could spend years exploring it. Next stop is hitting some of the museums and exploring all the amazing eateries Manhattan has to offer.

Hopkins is #1. Surprise!

http://health.usnews.com/health-news/best-hospitals/articles/2011/07/18/best-hospitals-2011-12-the-honor-roll

Johns Hopkins Hospital is #1 in the U.S. for the 21st year in a row. What does this mean to me? It means we, as employees, got free muffins on the hospital's dime.

In an email from the Dean:
Even as we acknowledge our collective delight with this long, unbroken string of top rankings, we want to give credit to those who really make Hopkins Hospital number one. No matter how historic or iconic, a building is merely bricks and mortar. It’s the dedicated people within that building who make it truly great. It’s you who provide the finest care to our patients and their families. You are at the center of our continual search for better treatment, better answers and better discoveries. Our hospital is exceptional because you are exceptional.

The bold part is really the only area I can take credit for. As researchers, we play a limited role in the day to day operations of the hospital. But some of the medical discoveries were driven by research done here.

I would like the think the phrase "Our hospital is exceptional because you are exceptional" was directed at me! Although I'm pretty sure it's directed more towards people like Dr. Patrick Walsh who pioneered work in the development of “the anatomic approach to radical prostatectomy”, which involves nerve-sparing techniques that have reduced the probability of impotence and incontinence. He just did his 4,567th and last surgery. Before him, nearly 100% of men that had a prostatectomy were impotent, so many of them decided to forego the treatment and ended up dying of metastasis that could have easily been avoided.

New Year's Resolution.. In July

I started this blog to share my adventures in Europe with with Idaho family, California family, friends, friends of friends, and family of friends located all across the US and pretty much anyone else who wants to stalk me and has nothin but time! Instead of emailing 100 people individually which would be quite slow, not to mention at the time, I wanted most of my focus to be on the friends I was making abroad and the experiences I was having, instead of being online emailing everyone all the time.

Now, back in the US, I'm no longer traveling for grad school interviews, so I saw no reason to continue writing. I now view my life as the perplexing conundrum of being extremely stressful yet boring. Normally stressful would somewhat imply excitement, but I'm learning that that is not necessarily so. Quite frankly, I have nothing to write about. Then I realized most blogs are people writing about nothing! Additionally, I quite often wrote for the benefit of my grandma, Honey, who would bug me as to why I did not put up another post if I didn't update bi-weekly. She is no longer with us so much of my motivation was gone. However, I've decided to go back to casting my thoughts and adventures out into the blogosphere if for no other reason than it's therapeutic and I like to look back and see the "road map" of sorts of my life. Plus instead of the blog being called "My Adventures in Europe" I renamed it "My Life" six months ago so I guess the topic of the blog is and will forever be relevant as long as I'm alive.

My two resolutions for the new year (which, I'm aware, is more than half way over) are to 1. eat more fiber and 2. to write a little something on my blog bi-monthly. Sadly, if I keep this up the next five months, my resolutions would have been kept longer than those who made theirs 1/1/2011. I'm just sayin.....


I went to visit my friend from Idaho, Paul, for the 4th of July weekend and we went to see the Liberty Bell! I was nothing but disappointed at it's size, upkeep, and it's failure to do what bells do, ring.

As a new grad student, you can imagine I've been very very busy and haven't been writing. I will post photos of my room soon! Now that I'm a grown up and pay taxes and all, I'm trying to not just say everything that comes to mind. However, this is my blog, a place where I can express my feelings, therefore, I will say whatever I want. But just to make sure I am conscious of my word choices, I will use this cross out feature to edit things that I would not say in public.

I find myself editing my words now. People don't like me to be me here. Apparently my cynicism, sarcasm, and essentially "funniness" don't translate well from the West Coast to the East Coast. For instance this is my response to the head of my program on how I liked it here----

Welllllllllllllll, Baltimore is a horrible, depressing place different. Most of the time I look around and think I made the wrong choice to come here for grad school how I'm not used to such surroundings. It's so sad how prevalent poverty is here and, in turn, crime.


While I was thinking the crossed out portions, because that's how I truly feel, I didn't say them.

Here's a get to know your neighborhood factoid: I found out two things which likely go hand-in-hand. Baltimore is apparently the syphilis capital of the world. As I'm now a "scientist," I should not be quoting inaccurate statements as facts. So, I've checked the statistics and I don't know that that is necessarily true now so much as something people just love to brag about (who knows why?), but I did find that back in the 90s it was entirely too true. Secondly, since sexual education isn't a Federal requirement, they don't teach it in the schools AT ALL here. They don't take the more progressive- "we know you are going to do it but protect yourself" stance. They don't take the "sex until marriage because God doesn't like it" stance. They don't even take the ever popular "this is the sickest and worst case scenario and only happens in 0.0009% of cases a photographic depiction of gonorrhea. If you have sex, you will get this, and you will die" scare tactic stance. Whoever designed the Maryland state budget needs a briefing STAT about the necessity of teaching a traditionally poverty ridden and undereducated community about the spread of STDs/STIs and prevention of pregnancy.

I have officially been here 47 days and my car hasn't been broken into and I haven't been mugged.. so that's good.

I follow the Baltimore Police Department on Twitter.... and Facebook.

We did have a scare a couple of weeks ago. Nothing special, just the usual mad gunman running on a wild shooting rampage on the campus where I attend school
http://news.blogs.cnn.com/2010/09/16/shooting-reported-at-johns-hopkins-hospital/

Update: I spoke too soon, my car was keyed 10/2010, $900 worth of damage. Welcome to the neighborhood!

Packing

We started with this.....


And six hours (and 270 pounds of clothing) later........


(I'm really really sad to leave)

Sorry I haven't been writing, my computer is really dunzo. I have officially spent more than 100 hours on planes in the last year! I can't wait to have a permanent home! By the time I settled into San Jose after this summer, traveling all February and March, I realized that I graduate in 5 weeks! Graduation is on Saturday, March 29th.

But everything was worth it, I will officially be a student of the Pathobiology Department at Johns Hopkins University come Fall 2010. Making this decision was difficult. I interviewed at 4 programs, UC Denver, Vanderbilt, and two programs at Johns Hopkins. I had turned down the program that I had dreamed about at UC Denver (tear) when I realized that Vanderbilt had more choices and would be better for my career. I went online and submitted my acceptance to the Vanderbilt program a week before the graduate school acceptance/denial date of April 15th.

Then..... I got an email on April 13th, in the afternoon, from Hopkins Pathobiology program. I was in a huge bind. It was two days before the deadline, I had technically already accepted at Vanderbilt, and I was really worried about the crime in Baltimore and the fact that both schools' stipends were the same but the cost of living in Baltimore is significantly higher. The worst part was only having a day to decide and I had a test, so I wasn't even able to sit and ponder it all night.

I polled professors, family members, and friends about what to do. I realized I had to go with my heart and the rest would work itself out. I could just live outside of downtown Baltimore where it's safer, careful budgeting would allow me to spread my stipend further, and Vanderbilt accepted a class of 140 so it was unlikely that rescinding my acceptance would affect my ability to collaborate with Vanderbilt faculty in the figure. I called Johns Hopkins and the director of admissions was over the moon, as was I. Then I called Vanderbilt, as I couldn't unaccept online and was offered additional money to attend. This gave me pause because one of the drawbacks of the school was that I would be just a number. The fact that the head of the program extended me an incentive to attend showed that they did actually want me. How strange to go from being rejected outright by some schools, to being waitlisted at others, and now schools are vying for my attention. It all happened in a span of days too! In the end, it all worked out. UC Colorado and Pathology at JH were tied for my second choice schools from the beginning of the application process and I was accepted to both schools and ended up at the right one for me!

It's weird. I felt like my head was going to explode as all this was happening, it was crazy to me that a small-town girl from Idaho, who was smart but not a genius by any means, is moving to the opposite coast to be paid to do ground-breaking research at a top tier school. Now that all the decisions have been finalized and all the paperwork had been signed, I can sit back and process it. I keep forgetting that I am a future JH student until someone reminds me. Besides, there is SOOOOO much to do in between now and then (passing my classes, graduation, moving back to Idaho, getting a summer job, making my first big purchase- a car, selecting roommates and an apartment online, and driving across the US to my new home) that I'm not going to think about it until it's a week before I need to leave. Well I'm half way to earning my Nobel Prize!

I feel like I can't even thank everyone enough. Some people that I only knew for a few weeks really affected the direction of my life. Many times I remember a piece of advice someone gave me and I'm sure they don't even imagine that they are still helping me make decisions. So many people have helped me along the way through emotional or financial support, they allowed me opportunities that I might not have been quite qualified for, and many believed in me and encouraged me.

I will have graduation parties in both Idaho and California so await your invitations. If you feel you might not be on the list for a graduation announcement, email me at brianacoles@yahoo.com. No gifts are necessary but, if you feel the need and don't have any ideas, I've made a registry at Target.com. http://www.target.com/lists/17AL1J48DXQT6

Baltimore Round 1

So this weekend was my first interview with the Pathobiology department at Johns Hopkins, in Baltimore, MD. I am trying to go hard my last semester of school. As usual, I'm taking 20 credits. But unlike last semester, I'm just coming off of resting for a month for Christmas break, and I've made a game plan for how I'm going to get back on schedule and balance all the things I have to do. So far I have received a few rejection letters from graduate programs. One was a relief and one was somewhat of a let-down. However, I have two interviews with different departments at JH, and one at the program I really wanted to go to in Colorado. When I stop to think about it, I got interviews at the schools which had the most interesting programs and were the best fit for me.

I also needed to do some tight planning as far as a study schedule this semester because I missed school this last Thursday and Friday and because of weather, I am missing tomorrow and possibly Tuesday. Then I was just invited to interview with the Cellular and Molecular Physiology department at JH (For Feb 14 and 15th), so I will be back in San Jose for just a few days before returning here. Then I will be back in school for the middle of the week before flying to Colorado and missing another Thursday and Friday of school (Feb 19,20,21).

So I got into Baltimore after an entire day of flying. On the light rail, I felt very uncomfortable. The people on the light rail didn't have a full set of teeth between the 15 of them. We were driving through some very rough and destitute areas. I was tired as well so my first impression of Baltimore wasn't great. On Friday we had our interviews. There were about 12 other people here to interview with me. We interacted a lot with the graduate students already in the program and they were so friendly and made it clear that although their first year is consumed by school, you do find time for yourself in the following years. That was really important to me, because, although I love research, I don't want to lose myself in the lab.

I interviewed with two professors which were really personable, and a graduate student that informed me since I would be enrolled in school at JH I could take any additional courses I wanted like keeping up with my Spanish. As well, when I was looking at Public Health masters program, I had looked at the School of Public Health here, but it is $50,000 for a one year program and you need to have minimum two years working experience. She told me that many of the PhD students choose to take classes through the school of Public Health. I really feel like I would get a well-rounded education here, and I would be able to combine all my passions instead of just focusing on my PhD work. The graduate student I interviewed with really made me want to take advantage of every single opportunity. Students don't have to write grants, but I really want to work on my grant writing skills and she said my boss would be overjoyed that I had that interest. She said she has to work harder than the other PhD students because she has additional tasks above and beyond her lab work, but it has also resulted in her being able to travel internationally to conferences basically everywhere.

Our whole conversation got me really excited about the school and the program. In addition, being in the hospital (even though it and the school are surrounded by a 10 foot tall fence and armed guards) made me feel like I would be working with the best of the best. The best doctors, the best med students, they have a world class eye institute, the best nurses, and the best researchers.

However, the weather reports said to expect two feet of snow from Friday afternoon to Saturday afternoon, so our interviews were pushed from 9:30-4 to 8:30-noon. Because of this change, my third professor interview was a stand in because my scheduled interviewer didn't make it to work. That was difficult because the new interviewer hadn't read my CV, my personal statement, my recomendation letters, or any of my packet, and he had a meeting. So we just went really quickly over my schooling, but didn't really cover things like why I wanted to be part of the program or my past research experiences.

Then the snow started.

We went out to dinner Friday night with just the graduate students and the events for Saturday morning were cancelled. After dinner, a few of us went to a hole in the wall bar with a lot of character. They brew all their own beer there, and the bar was just so unique. At this point I had started coming around to Baltimore. All the graffiti was covered in snow. The hotel is in one of the very nice parts of town, somehow I was able to kind of forget about the more destitute parts I had seen. When returning from the bar, it was apparent that this snow storm was no joke.

I woke up Saturday morning to about 20 inches of snow outside my hotel. Despite the city being comepletely unequipped for snowfall and therefore it completely shut down, the view from my suite was amazing!


I just kept looking at the swells on the side of the road thinking that they used to be cars. These people dug theirs out after a few hours of work! Not only is the city unprepared for snow, the residents don't have shovels or salt or anything to take care of the sidewalks or dig out cars.

So instead of leaving Sunday morning, my flight was rescheduled for Sunday night.... then Monday at 3pm, then Tuesday at 3pm. I cannot miss that much school! I got on the phone and yelled at the airline and the final verdict is that I will be taking a train to Philadelphia and flying out from there on Monday at 3pm. I was supposed to make it back Sunday at 5 and now I'll be back Monday at midnight. In addition, since the JH Saturday activities got cancelled, I've essentially been stuck in my hotel room alone for 2.5 days. I'm going stir crazy.

Today I went out walking. Unfortunately, as mentioned, none of the roads are plowed, none of the sidewalks are scraped. I thought I'd overpacked when I brought 7 outfits for two days. It turns out that wasn't a bad idea. One thing I didn't pack was real shoes. I got here with some flats and a pair of heels. Not quite suitable for the 25 inches of snow we've had total. Considering the weather reports were right and it only snowed for 24 hours, over two feet of snow was ridiculous. On my walk, moreso than ever, I really started picturing myself here.

ChristmasBreak

This break was very eventful, at the same time it wasn't, and I just had some much needed relaxing time. I can't even begin to describe the last month, so I'm going to make it more of a picture-driven summary.

It was just an adventure getting here. I got to my layover in Portland to find my flight to Boise was not just delayed but cancelled. This was Dec 17th. I was behind 140 other people in line, and they were telling the first few people, they could put them on stand-by for the 20th, let alone what they would have been able to do for me at the end of the line. Since BSU's graduation was the next day, many people had to get to Boise. I ended up renting a car with three complete strangers needing to go to the graduation and driving the 8 hours it takes to get from Portland to Boise. I got here at 2am... exhausted.
We had Christmas as usual, at Honey's. It's nice to have Mimi and her girls there, more people! And Christmas isn't as fun for adults, it's nice to have children there.

.
Christmas day we had too many meals. A big breakfast at Honey's. Late lunch with our family at Auntie Margaret's. Then, an early dinner at my mom's friend, Brian's. We ate, and then fell asleep on the floor.

We also got to hold Sarah's snake. EEEEH!



For New Years, I wanted to do something with my friends and with my mom. I needed the perfect outfit. I would wear silver, gold, and sequined clothing year round. However, my knowledge of fashion says that looking like a disco ball year round is a faux pas. After finding the perfect shinny shirt, my mom and I went out to a really fun dinner at PF Chang. We had cocktails, and our favorites- lettuce wraps and beef and broccoli. I don't think I'll ever get used to ordering drinks at restaurants, it's still so weird, even though I'm 22 now. Then she dropped me off with my friends. We had a good night ringing in the new year.

So, then I had a brilliant idea. I decided that it would be so FUN for me to take my baby cousin, Zoey. Not fun. We took her after Sabrina's birthday. We took her all around. Things I learned:
1. I didn't know babies needed to much stuff, heavy stuff.
2. Their equipment=complicated.
3. As much as I talk using words, they like to scream using cries.
4. She wakes up 4 times a night. And when she wakes up, she's not happy.
5. Apparently you have to take a baby shopping with you, driving with you, dinner, to friend's houses, they are going to scream if you want to have a conversation with someone on the phone.

And at the end of your day, your friends just don't know. As she screamed her face off and I was trying to have a conversation on the phone, I found myself saying, "I don't have time for things like going out! You have fun with that. I actually have a CHILD I have to take care of. I have responsibilities!"

I think even my mom was getting frustrated with her. We tried all the things that usually babies like. She didn't want to be rocked, she didn't want a bath, she didn't want her bottle, she didn't want to sleep, she doesn't like the car, thus we dubbed her the "Bad Baby."


After we took her home, I slept the whole next day. I was exhausted. And we didn't even have her 24 hours, it seemed like days. While it was not the "fun" experience I thought it would be, it was certainly a learning experience.

Robby took me up to Bogus skiing. I hadn't skied in 14 years except for doing a few runs with Molly in High School. After a few times on the Bunny Hill, I re-got the hang of it. In no time, I was impressing myself. I went all over the mountain. Although I was sore the whole next week in odd places, it was really really fun. He's been trying to drag me skiing for years, and I finally went, and it was actually fun! On the way down from the mountain, I was admiring Idaho's scenery. Although I love the city, I've also really been missing the outdoor community of Idaho. (I know, you never thought you'd hear me say that!)


My mom and I jetted up to McCall for the weekend. We spent most of the time watching old VHS tapes (and complaining about the crummy quality). There was so much snow there! We had a great dinner at a little Chinese restaurant. My mom and I are very big into sharing entrees these days. We had just tried a little Vietnamese restaurant in downtown Boise which was adventurous but fun! At the Chinese restaurant in McCall, we ordered spicy Mongolian beef, which I wouldn't normally try, but it was actually amazing.... despite the fact I was sweating and had to drink about five cups of water. My face turned red too. I have no tolerance for spice. The next night, we stopped at the Club for a drink and went and had appetizers at Hotel McCall. It was nice to get away for a few days. Bubble is so nice to let everyone use her cabin!


On the drive back, I once again had to sit back and think how fortunate we are to be able to see such beautiful scenery right in our back yard!

The last couple days have been crazy! Let's review:

Last week I got my first interview invite.... to Johns Hopkins! I was so excited, I wanted to faint. I couldn't believe it. Freshman year of high school, I did not envision myself being a biology major, accomplishing as much as I have academically, having all these amazing opportunities likes studying abroad and researching this summer, and certainly didn't see myself applying and actually being competitive for some of the schools on my list. It's crazy how life happens.

Monday was my birthday. I received two cakes, one from my apartment-mate Rachel and one from Brittany. I had a test in my hardest class. Although I had spent a lot of time preparing, I was surprised by 1/3 of the test being on material he hadn't covered or told us to know (I was later told he covered it the lecture AFTER the test.) So clearly I was not in a good mood. I hit the library as soon as it opened and then had class straight from morning until 7pm. I hardly got to talk to anyone. On the way to dinner with Kelsey and Brittany, I got a call from my dad saying my birthday present was tickets to the Sharks v. Penguins hockey game on Saturday. I was screaming my head off somewhat inappropriately for being in public. I was so excited because the Penguins are really good and won the Stanley Cup last year, and I really dislike them because of all the hype. And the Sharks were amazing last year up until the playoffs and they are pretty decent this year. It was going to be a great match up, but when Kelsey and I looked for tickets months ago, they were all either sold out or too expensive.

Kelsey and Brittany took me out to East Asian cuisine. I had chicken dumplings which were unusually spicy and really good steak satay. All the food was very different. It wasn't an Americanized East Asian, it was very traditional. Kelsey had some salad we spent the majority of the time trying to figure out what the heck was in it. We went back to their apartment for CAKE. Then I came home, thinking about how I should have been at the library studying.... oh well.

So Friday, I had the ABRCMS conference in Phoenix. Thursday after class, I drug Kelsey and Brittany to the mall because I really disliked my old suit and I really adhere to the principle if you don't look good, you don't feel good. I really wanted something that would fit me more comfortably and looked sharper. I really just wanted a jacket and was surprised at how much they cost. You can get a suit for $200, but a jacket is $150+? I finally found something a little less formal but it fit me well- herringbone slacks and a black, silk shirt. Then, we went to dinner. I went to bed at 1am because after having a crazy week with tests, birthday, and presentations, I hadn't printed my boarding pass, packed my purse, figured out how I was getting to and from the airports, or anything. I'm not usually this unprepared.

After getting exactly 2.5 hours of sleep (coming off a week where I'd had maybe ten hours combined sleep), I sprung up and got ready. I had to pack my purse carefully. The dilemma was that I had to carry everything that I'd possibly need for an entire day trip where I'd be sleeping, the temperature would be changing, and I'd need to freshen up, yet small enough that I could carry it all day. I'd arranged for a taxi to take me to the airport. You live and learn these things. After doing it, now I know how to call ahead and arrange for a taxi. I was really down after everything went so smoothly I realized I was at the airport 1.5 hours early for a 6am flight.


I arrived in Phoenix and took another taxi, where I figured out that system as well. I got to see my friend Ruth! I also hung out with Oneil, also from summer research. We were sad the rest of our crew wasn't there. I'm considering adding one school to my list as a result of the conference, but instead, it was good to go around and get more specific information about the schools I applied to (like a summary of the weather.) However, going there has made me even more up in the air about where I want to go. In addition, they gave me some good advice about interviews and just generally what to look for when I visit a school. Once again, this conference focused on minorities. It was sad to see some of the schools begging for African-Americans to apply. Maybe instead of starting at graduate school, they could start by having high schools try to graduate more blacks and then universities. From there, it should be a given that there would be a large pool of qualified African-Americans that would be competitive for positions in graduate school, instead of trying to lower the standards for graduate school in order to recruit more diversity now.

For lunch we had a guest speaker who among her many accomplishments double majored in African-Art and some engineering field, medical school, Peace Corps tour, started two businesses, was on People magazines 50 Most Beautiful People list, and was an astronaut in space. The most I can say is, "When I was in Dublin..." and she said "When we were drifting through the Aurora Borealis..." I did a few more hours of networking and before I knew it it was time to head to the airport. Martha came to pick me up (she lives two hours away from Phoenix.) I was so excited, I hadn't seen her in months! We drove around and around Phoenix looking for a place to eat dinner. We eventually stopped at this Chinese restaurant. It was the most run-down place I've EVER seen. I mean, there were bars on the windows... of a restaurant. And to get to the bathroom you literally have to weave through the middle of the kitchen. I got to the bathroom to realize there was no window in the window space, just a rug over it blocking the wind from the outside. The bathroom had only a hook latch for a lock. The toilette paper was hung on a loop of wire. To wash you hands there was an old bottle of watered down Joy dishsoap and now towells. When Martha and I ordered a drink, she brought 2 cans of Sprite and two glasses, no fountain drinks. However, the food was really really good. There are pictures, but at this time I had been awake way too much, and my body (including my complexion) felt the effects. In the picture, I look old. I went to the airport and got on the plane. Kelsey and Jesse picked me up in San Jose and I came home and crashed!

Saturday was game day! When I found out about the game, I went online and ordered a Sharks shirt and had it overnighted. In all my time here, I hadn't invested in any Sharks-wear yet, but I thought now is the time. I didn't really think about the game until like three hours prior and then I started getting really really antsy. When you are sitting at the game, it's like you almost don't believe it. The HP Pavillion is walking distance from campus, and imagine 17,000 people consolidated to a few blocks radius, the police shut down the streets because there is so much foot traffic. Everyone is really excited (or maybe just really drunk) and the mood is contagious. We had really great seats in the 15th row. Apparently they serve wine at hockey games. I'll upload the picture on Picasa, they give you a tiny plastic cup full of wine, and put a lid on it. When they handed it to us, Kelsey and I looked at eachother laughing. It looked exactly like a urine sample that you would give at a hospital and it was so comical that they would put a lid on it.



The game was amazing. There were three fights and the Sharks won 5-0. There were a few lone Penguins fans bold enough to wear a jersey. It seemed unreal. I never thought I'd be sitting watching the Sharks and the famed Sydney Crosby!